When today finally came, all of the boys were up and ready for the day at 6:30. (Even the biggest boy...they were all excited to race their cars.) They headed off for a pre-race breakfast at McDonald's and then to get their cars weighed and registered. Little man and I chose to skip all of that excitement and we headed over right at start time. The plan was to have the Tigers race first.
How plans change. We got there and got settled, expecting the heats to start at 9:30. A half an hour later, they (you know..."THEY") let us know that the races would start with the oldest cub scouts and then go through the dens to the youngest....the Tigers would go last. So, we waited again. After about an hour, everyone was getting tired and cranky and was ready to go home. So, of course, it was time to start the races.
The whole process is too long and confusing to even understand, yet explain. Basically, every car races on every track and there is some super secret formula that comes up with a winner.
Jeffrey's car ended up first or second in just about every heat he was in. (I say just about because I was trying to watch the race, keep Joshua occupied, and make sure that Jacob was handling the whole process.) He was SO excited!!
Jacob's car never came in last....but it never came in first either. He got his car from this finish line every time with a big smile.
And, then...it all started to go downhill.....
They announced the kids from each den who would be going on to the finals. Jeffrey's name was called and Jacob's wasn't. That's when the tears started. Jacob couldn't understand why Jeffrey was called and he wasn't. He sat in my lap and cuddled up close and the tears were just running down his little face. All he could say, over and over, was that Jeffrey's name was called and his wasn't.
(In the meantime, Jeffrey's car was racing in the Pack finals. There were some FAST cars from some of the other dens. His was making a good showing, but wasn't ever coming in first.)
After the tears, then Jacob started to get angry. He balled up his fists and started stalking the Pinewood Derby emcee. (This poor guy had NO idea that we were trying everything we could to keep Jacob from going off on him. He wasn't even part of the pack...he's from the Boy Scout troop and comes back to help with the Derby every year.) While there was no screaming or yelling or growling, I was VERY afraid that Jacob was going to take a swing at the man. I was also very afraid of the look on his face. It was like a child who had become possessed. His whole body was tense, his heart was beating SO fast, and he was glaring through slits in his eyes. When talking (and prompting and reminders) didn't work, I had to carry him out of the room to give him a chance to cool off.
Once that happened, he was able to come back in and watch the rest of the races. He almost cracked a smile a few times. And then it was time for the awards ceremony. I offered to take a walk with him so he didn't have to see the trophies being given out, but he refused. He watched the big kids get their trophies and then he watched as the Tiger winners were announced.
I figured that Jeffrey would get second place. He car was fast, but another boy had a car that seemed faster. I knew that Jeffrey would just be happy to get a trophy, so we were just ready to clap and cheer when his name was called. The Cub Master called the 3rd place winner and the 2nd place winner...and neither one was Jeffrey. He won 1st Place for the den! He was so excited and we were so excited for him!!
And then the tears started again. The reaction this time was just sadness. My heart broke for my baby. It was a terribly feeling. I was so happy for one and so devastated for the other.
I am, however, proud of Jacob for his reaction. There was a point where he would have had a meltdown in the middle of the floor and he would not have been able to recover. While there was a moment when I wasn't sure what was going to happen, I think he did a great job calming himself down. I am also proud of Jeffrey. He was SO excited, but he could tell that Jacob was sad and he didn't make a huge deal about his trophy or show it off to his brother.
Today was a hard day to be a twin mom. There are other families where one brother won and one brother lost....but this is a little different. We have always let one win and one lose, but they have always done things together. Their names have always been called together. I'm not even sure if Jacob's problem was less that he lost and more that Jeffrey's name was called and his wasn't.
Either way, today was a good day for life lessons. Jeffrey learned how to win gracefully and Jacob learned that you don't always win and it's okay. Hopefully, they both had a little bit of fun.
...and next time, the outcome will probably be completely opposite!
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